Thursday, April 11, 2013

Destiny vs Decision in Shakespeare's Words

Every spring for the last six years, I stick introduced a group of nervous ninth-graders to the scratch line human I love: William Shakespeare. As I pronounce those first words, Two households, two(prenominal) alike in dignity, and set Romeo and Juliet spinning to their doom, I accredit these kids think they are reading the greatest love taradiddle ever written. I sp stopping point the next six weeks hard to force them to see beyond the utter beauty and heart-breaking bray of Shakespeares words to understand that the play is a tragedy, a cautionary tale for teenagers and their parents. Inevitably, we come to the same sticking detail: could Romeo and Juliet have avoided their fate? Were they indeed star- pickyed (or as Romeo puts it, fortunes fool[s])? Or were they victims of circumstance, of their make ill-advised decisions, and of the actions of misguided adults? Since Shakespeare leaves room for both interpretations, I always turn to personal experience for an answer.

My own love business relationship is not actually a dream with a long-dead poet, scarce my courtship with a wonderful man two years my senior. (Ironically, Mr. Shakespeare, he is an attorney, but wonderful, nonetheless. Its a very famous Shakespearean quote, kids: Kill all the lawyers.) Our story does lend itself to the argument for fate. We met in college sort of. I first noticed him during Pepperdines freshman orientation, where he participated in a presentation intimately the universitys international programs. During the same assembly, the upperclassmen joked about the number of couples who met at Pepp and later unify. One quipped, Your future pardner could be in this very room. I got goose bumps term everyone else looked around and laughed nervously. I was secretly convinced that it might actually be true.

We were formally introduced by his girlfriend, who was an acquaintance of mine and my shooting partner in acting class, but our paths didnt cross some(prenominal) subsequently that. Once, when he spoke at our domesticates weekly convocation, I leaned over to a sorority babe and said that I knew his girlfriend, and that I wished I could end up with someone like him. We were both active Greeks, and at the metre that his m separate passed away, I was serving as corresponding repository and was responsible for sending a sympathy card on behalf of the chapter. Standing in the card aisle, stressing to select something appropriate, I began to cry, and had to explain to my roommate that I didnt actually roll in the hay him, but that he just seemed so nice that it wasnt fair that something like this should happen to him.

When we were set up on a blind date five years later, he only vaguely remembered meeting me in college. So much for love at first sight. This is where fate seems to have stepped out.

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later that first date, I almost declined to go out again, but was convinced by a friends keep up that, since he seemed to have met all the requirements on my list, I should try again. Several weeks and four or five dates later, I panicky and almost ruined everything. He decided that I must(prenominal) be as crazy as all the some other girls hed dated and stopped calling. After a few very quiet days, in desperation, I called and apologized. inside three months, we had each experienced, separately, a moment where we looked at the other and thought, Im going to marry this person. So, was this our share? Or were our early interactions only coincidence? Was my awareness of him in college exclusively a crush, or was it because I tend to be to a greater extent spiritual, more intuitive than him? In other words, were the signs there, even though he didnt see them? Was fate toying with us? Were we bound to meet, one way or another? What would have happened if I didnt call, after all? Fortunately, I did call, and we were married in July of 2005, three and a half years after our first date. In a formal church wedding, we interchange rings, meant to be a symbol of love that has no end and no beginning.

Inscribed inside his ring are the words, My destiny and my decision.

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